So I'm craving attention and I'm honestly contemplating Balizza. But instead I shall be spending this evening with a cup of coffee, finishing the last of the insurance law notes and read 10 pages managerial economics. Damn I feel pathetic. And my feet are rather cold. And I'm lonely. Hate this feeling which doesn't seem to disappear. A constant companion. Would prefer something remarkable to happen but it just doesn't seem to be meant for me lately. A constant blur of what I know it should be. Hate that feeling of SHOULD. As if anything I do isn't enough because it should feel like this. Because you have been spending too much time with that person you should feel like that. And because you are not spending enough time with that person you should behave like this. And I don't know anything anymore. The feeling of happiness isn't constant. Maybe it isn't the right thing after all.. Fuck I just want to cry. But the tears seem to have dried up a long time ago.
