So I've currently spent almost 9 hours alone. By myself. In this fucking flat. And I'm possibly having the biggest meltdown of the year. I can't stop shaking and would love to take a long bath and lie under the water and pretend the world doesn't exist, but this tattoo is not properly healed yet so that's out of question. I don't even know what is going on with me anymore. Haven't sat down and had a moment to myself since I don't know when, probably the last time I struggled to get off the floor due to crying and lack of breathing capability.
My car is hopefully coming back tomorrow. When I'm also writing public ecos. Then after that test I shall try to sort out the things I do not speak of.
It's a long weekend this weekend. That could really have happened ANY OTHER FUCKING TIME.
I've tried to cook. Ended up throwing up. Might not have been the brightest of ideas. I have a goddamn fever and a lump in my tummy of how loneliness is so much better when you're not alone.
